It just made me tired

"You say I choose sadness, that it never once has chosen me... maybe you're right"

"Being lonely is a habit, like smoking or taking drugs. I've quit 'em both, but man was it rough."

Jenny, you and I have so much in common. I'm tired of this loneliness and I still have a ways to go. I switch on and off so easily. The simplest thing can send me into tears.

I'll let Jenny explain some more:

"Sometimes in the morning I am petrified and cant move, awake but cannot open my eyes. And the weight is crushing down on my lungs I know I cant breathe, and hope someone will save me this time. And your mother's still calling you insane and high, swearing it's different this time. So you tell her to give in to the demons that posses her, that God never blessed her inside. Then you hang up the phone and feel badly for upsetting things, crawl back into bed to dream of a time when your heart was open wide and you loved things just because, like the sick and the dying. And sometimes when you're on, you're really fucking on, and your friends they sing along and they love you, but the lows are so extreme that the good seems fucking cheap and it teases you for weeks in its absence. But you'll fight it and you'll make it through, you'll fake it if you have to and you'll show up for work with a smile."

I'm not myself without you here. I fumble my words, I lose interest, I crave you.

I dont even want to finish this.